No Running!

This past weekend we went to a wedding. Baby M was invited and attended in a nice white shirt and some very nice $60 black shoes (where oh where did he get these extra wide feet that only fit in Stride Rite shoes?). After the ceremony and before the reception really got started we were in the ballroom and Baby M was running around like a maniac on the empty dance floor. Add a welding mask and some leg warmers and he'd have been ready for his Flashdance audition. Two little girls came into the room and immediately joined Baby M in all his hyperactive glory. It was cute. The three of them, dressed liked little aristocrats running around like little hooligans. Then the girls mother walks in and says "Girls, no running."

This immediately made me wonder, should Baby M not be running? Am I being a bad parent? We all know it doesn't take much to make me question my parenting. I went through my checklist:

1. Is Baby M endangering himself? No.
2. Is Baby M endangering someone else? Nope.
3. Is Baby M unduly disrupting other people? I looked around the half-empty room. The bride and groom would be taking pictures for at least another 20 minutes and in this pre-intoxicated state no one was getting near the dance floor. In fact, I would argue that the toddlers were pretty good entertainment for the bored couples sitting around the edge of the room.
   

So I said nothing and I let Baby M keep running. I did feel bad for the two little girls who stood despondently by their mother as Baby M ran in circles until he collapsed, happily announcing "I fell down". I'm sure his squeals of delight sounded like taunting to them-- "Neh neh neh neh I get to run." I wondered if I should hold Baby M back for their benefit.

What do you do when your standards of behavior are different from another parent's? Should the stricter parent's standards automatically be adopted? Obviously when you are in someone's home you follow their rules, but what about at a park? or at a wedding? I'm sure the parents with more draconian standards think they have the higher ground, but I'm not so sure. Isn't joyful exuberance one of things we remember fondly from childhood? Is a little noise so bad? Perhaps I am that mom. The one that all the other moms talk about behind her back, the one that they secretly want to give a copy of Dare to Discipline. Or maybe I'm the mom whose kid isn't afraid to express himself, who lives joyfully, who doesn't worry about what others think and who sucks all the marrow out of life. I'd be pretty happy If I'm that mom. But I can't say with any confidence that I'm either of those moms. More likely, I'm just a mom, taking it day by day, trying to do the best I can.